Reflections from Class

Last night Andy's Bible made it into the car, but mine did not. Since he was practicing a huge amount of selflessness and took my place for nursery duty last night, I was able to use his Bible for my class. I felt like I was in a different country using his Bible.

I am lost without my Bible!

This is not the reason for my post, but the notes to the class last night are in his Bible, which he took to work, of course! I will try and recap because it is just something well worth sharing with my fellow friends.

We started our fall classes a few weeks ago at church. I am taking a class on prayer, taught by Denise, the lovely wife of the Patrick I briefly mentioned a few posts ago. Since he now has such a big head because I mentioned him two times in the same post I need to boast about his wife and remind him that she is way cooler than he is!

She is a blessing, let me tell you. She loves the Lord with everything she has and she is so passionate about the topic of prayer. Her experiences in life are hilarious in hindsight, but while she was going through them I'm sure were not. She shares from her heart and I have truly been blessed to have her in my life.

Each week we are studying a different character in the Bible and learning from an experience they went through to learn more about prayer and how God works through prayer. This week was Daniel. The Lord was able to use Daniel for some supernatural things because Daniel was humble in heart and willing to be used by God. We were in Daniel 10 when Daniel saw a vision of a man. Some pretty strange stuff went on. Daniel lost his speech but when the messenger touched him it was restored.

I'm going to be honest and say that I've never felt anything that crazy before in my life. But, it's not because I don't believe that can still happen today. It was quite a challenge though. Made me really ponder if my actions truly show that I believe that God works the same ways today that he did during the days the Bible was written. It's a controversial topic, I know, but I'd love to hear your thoughts. Because I know some believe He does not work the same ways He use to. This topic is just so near to my heart. I could talk about it for hours. I know some of you could too!

We talked a lot about giving up control of our lives and letting God lead where He wants us to go. That's so easy to say, but such another thing to actually do. How in the world could I possibly know what's best for my life when God created me and knows absolutely everything about me. I can hardly decide what I'm making for dinner each night, much less where and if we should move from here! If we give Him control He will lead us and make those decisions clear.

All in all I have gained so much encouragement through this class. It has jump started a deeper prayer life and has reminded me just how powerful our God is and how much he truly wants us to draw closer to Him. I need to practice a lot more praying and a lot less doing. It's when I try and get in the middle of something God is working on it gets all messed up. If I could just sit back and give Him control I can't even imagine what He would be capable of doing.

Thank you Lord for not leaving me in charge of my life! I would be utterly lost without you.

I Am A Homemaker!

I don't have any other homemaker friends around. It's a hard life to lead with little moral support. It's a lonely life when there are no other women who share your biggest hearts desire. I have begun to gain encouragement from other women's blogs online. On in particular that I just found is Abbi's. She sees life through the same lens I do, and I am always rejuvenated when I visit her site. Today she had a great post about homemaking. Here is a quote from a book she is reading from John Seymour: Forgotten Household Crafts.

When a woman says she is a housewife she should say it with the utmost pride, for there is nothing higher on this planet to which she could aspire."

If I could only live every day as though I really do truly believe that, then all would be well in my world. I have no greater passion in life than to make our house a home and to give my family the best of everything I can provide. No mother's life is easy, that is for sure. We get down on ourselves and question if we are doing the best we can. I had a mother who did it all, worked full time and was the greatest provider a child could want. How am I seemingly struggling with staying home?! It's a mystery. But, when I'm having one of those days where I can't seem to get the confidence to convince myself that what I'm doing here is truly making a difference and that it matters to my family I have a loving Savior who reminds me:

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30.

What a relief to know that I do not have to do it on my own. I have a Savior who is waiting to carry me along. He does not want to carry me along just when I am having difficulties on my own, but for me to find rest in Him every day of my life. I can't imagine a better solution to my problems.

Monday Blues

The weekend is over and there are a million dishes to show for it. I made stromboli yesterday for our small group and it turned out great. Sorry you missed it Patrick!

Samuel got a molar in. He took it like a champ as usual. I'm sure there's more to follow, but one has finally surfaced. Hasn't been up at all in the night, but has just had a little appetite.

He also got his first set of crayons and a drawing pad. Hasn't quite figured out yet that they aren't for eating. I saw that coming a mile away.

Most Mondays I look forward to just getting back into a slower pass, but today I'm not glad it's here. Trying to soak up as much time with Andy as possible, it hasn't seemed like there's ever enough lately.

I can't tell if it's hormones due to the pregnancy or not, but the emotional roller coaster ride has been more than I can take most days. God has been challenging me in ways I've needed to be challenged for years but I was just not ready. It's emotionally draining! I'm glad it's finally here though, because when God wants me to change, it's always for the better! It's time I walk the walk.

Enjoy the pictures!

I'm fully aware this is not the picture of the stromboli I was talking about earlier. It's a chicken pot pie I made that I decided to commemorate the day we heard Baby Pig's heartbeat.


Cute family photo after church. (Thanks Patrick) Andy did the communion meditation and did a wonderful job. Samuel's first time in a long sleeve shirt, pants and shoes. I admit I went overboard, but I am super sick of this hot weather. I thought I would take advantage of the temperature dropping a few degrees to start this kid getting use to wearing clothes. They were all summer clothes, though! Don't think he was suffering! At least I didn't try and put him in some adorable wool sweater I've been dying to put him in! And to once again commemorate another occasion, my first day in pregnancy clothes!

It All Seems More Real Now

We heard a heartbeat yesterday! Baby Pig seems to have a great heart beat. The doctor said I might be a little farther along than we think, or that there might be more than one in there based on where she could feel the baby from the outside of my belly. She said it was higher than normal. I know she's at least wrong on the age of the baby, but the multiple babies, I'm still wondering about. Yikes! She could only find one heartbeat though, so that probably means there really is only one!

It's a long story, but this was my first appointment and it wasn't with the doctor that will deliver BP. I have an appointment with her on the 14th. This doctor was just the first doctor I could get in to see and I wanted to see someone as soon as I could because with the threat of moving and all we were behind the 8 ball in getting seen. She just wanted to make sure the heartbeat was good and that my levels were doing fine. So, I didn't get to see BP, but I sure heard her* sweet heartbeat.

The best sound you could ever imagine. Well, next to them quack like a duck when they are born. Not sure if all babies sound like a baby duck when they are born, but Samuel sure did!

*Not sure if I clarified this before, but we say 'she' because it is a mini mommy and I'm a girl. I tend to call it a boy too, just because I've only ever had a boy in there. Soon enough we will know :)

I guess I left out a major part... After talking with this doctor I knew the inevitable topic would come up about trying to have a VBAC or a C-section again. She confirmed my worst nightmare, and what I've been hearing for the past 14 months, that there is no way a doctor is going to let me try and labor. Considering my circumstances, I most likely cannot have a vaginal birth and the chances are too high to try. It comes as a huge disappointment because I wanted nothing more than a natural birth with Samuel and then to try for one with BP. I have come to realize that I want to remain healthy myself, but more importantly to have a healthy baby in the process. I suppose having another c-section is going to give both of us the best fighting chance at staying healthy.

At least the odds of having BP on my half birthday are looking more promising. The idea of scheduling when to have a baby is so ironic to me, considering the fact that I thought I was going to have Samuel every day for over 24 straight days! The mystery will be gone. I think as stressful as it was then, looking back on it, that was my favorite part. I'll have to find a new favorite part with this birth. I'm sure it won't be hard.

25

My birthday was wonderful. The best so far, I believe. We had a great time on our night away to the Morrison House. We even got the same room we had on our honeymoon.

Andy made me an amazing present. I could hardly believe it when I saw it. He had chosen the 4 stones when he was deployed last year. He got them on the beach of Cyprus. The top one represents Christ, the left one represents him (blue), the right one me (green) and then the bottom one Samuel (also blue). Blue for Little Boy Blue, and green for Little Girl Green. The stones sit about 1/8" into the cross. He carved the cross out of a limb he found of cherry wood. He then finished it off with some furniture polish the Hunter's make here at the farm out of beeswax.